Goodnight my chunky, little, marshmallow muncher
The guy asked if i had a problem w/set schedules
I am really glad that on the inside of a card from your grandparents you have transcribed the rules for circle of death
the condom got lost in my hair
still wasted. at home depot . just threw up in one of the demo showers. not okay.
Yes. I am getting trashed on an open tab while judging a karoke competition
Impressive. I approve.
It was darkish out, I was shit faced, and they should have marked the electric fence a little more clearly. The entire wedding reception saw me run full force into it
ummm im also counting the $14 dollars I gave the old guy to pay for the cab I called for him to take to the hospital last night as part of ur present.
You know I'm having a rough day when I'm curled up in the corner eating Spaghettios.
Seriously I'm dying. All my insides are fighting their way out of me. With light sabers and machetes.
Do you have a moment to talk about our lord and savior, Kendra's boobs?
He interrupted me giving him head to ask if I were hungry, because he wanted to eat pizza. Wtf.
You have to give it to him that he fucked me out of the dull weekdays.
I always felt my time would come in the form of a tidal wave of whisky
Now i know i wasnt that drunk... So why are there texts of me volunteering for a nude photo shoot for an art major student?
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