But i did once see a show where a women was homeless and installed a stove in a school bus so she and her baby could live there since all the seats were taken out. As far as being homeless goes it didn't look half bad...So this is me promising to you that if i ever am living in an abandoned school bus...i will at least pimp it out with a stove so you can come over for dinner sometimes
While at warped tour today a girl was crowd surfing and her vagina landed in my face, I call that a successfull day.
I never thought to pass out in a hotel lobby rather then paying for a hotel room until you taught me that's acceptable at the Hilton
deryk tried to steal your screen door and i think sam and brent are duct taping lauren to the diving board.
why is my new profile picture on Facebook one of me with a bunch of strangers on an elevator?
I gather from Facebook you got drunk last night and took semi naked pictures of yourself?
Downloaded the Pocket Penguin app. There are now penguins living in my phone. Technology is wonderful.
She thinks I'm afraid I'm gonna get caught in one of my lies and some of the girls I'm fucking will find out about each other. But it would be a relief to offload a few from the old crop and work in a few newbies into the rotation. The organization could use some new blood.
Seriously considering modifying my computer case so it can dispense wine. I need to make a bunch of changes and reorganize it's guts anyway....
The cup holder in my recliner holds a whole bottle of wine. That's definitely a sign.
Kyle passed out in the tub after breaking a glass and shouting, "WHAT ASSHOLE GAVE ME A GLASS?" His girlfriend gave it to him...
you don't need to worry about using proper grammar if you're asking for the size of his dick.
Im sorry for telling you id rather jump into traffic than date you again. I didnt mean to be so rude
I will literally have glitter in my crotch for weeks.
We hooked up and he sent me home with a plant and skittles lmao
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