How can i ever say i miss u when u wont go away
Welp...herpes.
I just found $40 in the jeans I wore last night. PS I also found the jeans I wore last night.
i've decided that sluts are like cars. they may look good as hell on the outside, but you never know what kind of shit is hiding under the hood.
Fastest blow job ever. Though it was probably a good thing since we were in front of my house.
So hungover. Sitting in class about to puke during this ladys flute performance. Not sure why were having a flute concert in biology
Have you ever had one of those moments when you kept whispering to yourself "I'm not a slut, I'm not a slut..."?
It's four o'clock and my 60yo aunt's tits have already made an appearance and there is a dildo traveling around the room periodically assaulting family members. Strangely I am thankful.
We opted you as the sacrificial dick tonight. We need our patron cafe. Go make some moves.
We found him wrapped up in a giant table umbrella in the bathroom.
you regret 100% of the tequila shots you do take. thats what gretzky meant to say
the first cop to show up was this girl who hooked up with our home ec teacher in high school, she knows about questionable decisions
I figure even if it starts out as just sex I can bang him into loving me
No it's like. I don't respect you. And I think you're a terrible person but. I still wanna bone it out.
How did people get blow jobs before text messaging?
Randomize
