Weirdest conversation with my dad. He just told me he didn't shave his pubes.
No one goes out in public like that, unless they do anal
Being a slut is okay if you're being a polite slut, right?
no. you're not making a beach trip out of my abortion.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Plotting your own moral demise should not be this fun
Hhahaha he is. Omg the new polish friend just took his pants off in front of me. There is something wrong with this nationality.
I had a great penis washing session in the sink before I left. Washed off all the bar and green beer
We got back together. The pastures weren't greener on the other side, the dicks were just smaller
I blacked out at work again... Except this time my boss watched me throw up by the bus stop and some woman let me sleep on her shoulder for an hour. Why does this keep happening?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I slapped him but he didn't wake up. He just nuzzled my head, hugged me closer, and smiled.
I just set up a proportion to calculate how much Jolly Rancher vodka I can make with the limited amount of Jolly Ranchers I have. Finally, real-life application of math.
You were wearing a sequin mini, with Tevas. And you still got laid.
idk what to be more embarrassed/confused about, that i lost my underwear or that i woke up covered in fried rice
What do you want. Tryin to service my husband like the good wife that I am. It is bj Tuesday
Woke up way too warm in the middle of a spooning sandwich. Was working up a rant about still not wanting a threesome. Then I realized the littlest spoon was the dog. Might need to break up anyway.
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