Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(845): View more from New York

Just got an Edible Arrangement my parents sent me for my birthday. Time to marinate some fruit in vodka.

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(480): View more from Arizona

Just got an email from TMobile. Said they were going to pursue "more qualified" candidates. So this is what rock bottom feels like.

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(778): View more from British Columbia

Man the liquor store just wrong numbered me, its a sign even god wants me to drink

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(804): View more from Virginia

have to get expensive furniture. after that study abroad now at least six things at ikea are named after guys i slept with

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(281): View more from Texas

To tired for the bar. Came home and drank wine out of the bottle. Kind of don't want to know what that says about my life.

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(323): View more from California

Me and the guy at the liquor store are on a first name basis, college is all about networking.

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(361): View more from Texas

I woke up with the suicide hotline number saved as 'Hot Guy Josh'

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(303): View more from Colorado

You licked my eyeball, you are officially cut off. If you just missed you can have a second chance on Friday.

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(425): View more from Washington

Ran into my FWB on my walk of shame and went back to her place. Even my walk of shames are awesome!!!

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