I am in the hospital with a broken wrist because a guy told me that if I punched him it "wouldn't hurt." it hurt. me. Thank you 11 jello shots.
I yelled "Coming in hot." before penetrating. Im pretty sure she loved it.
Just beat off to internet porn while talking to my mom on the phone and eating a cinnamon roll. U have 5 minutes to get on my level
Dude he was freaking out because he thought he was walking on crates, and he just kept saying help me
I an in a belgian bar and i cant understand shit. Trying to talk to strangers. Getting drunk until we all speak the same language. Brace for updates.
today is just not my day... it could be raining penises and I would get hit in the face by a vag
No. I just want to cuddle and talk about our feeling. Of course this a booty call.
The lady at Walgreens was all excited my pregnancy tests had a coupon.
Well he fell three stories from the balcony and still had the strength to fuck me for 2 hours.
I fell asleep masterbating while watching family guy... This is what happens when girl's night gets canceled
im trying to look as sober as possible but i just poured orange juice and mayo into my milkshake.
Since when is my clitoris pierced?
Its 9 am & i've been cleaning for 6 hours now with occasional crying bursts and two cocktails. Adulting 101.
While we were doing it he looked up at me and said "Does your husband fuck you this good?" Talk about a mood killer....
Last night I made out with two lesbians while dancing with another girl. I'm pretty sure it wasn't even real life.
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