sorry if i was weird last night, had weird deja vu that we had done that before, i mean with the peanut butter.
we had.
well that explains the rash. i dont think i should see you again.
She actually asked me 'is it in yet?' I deleted the vid.
woke up next to her writing my name in some journal. apparently she makes every guy she hooks up with sign out.
She bought a fucking hedgehog. And that's just the tip of the crazy iceberg.
If you're still on campus there's a jack and coke in the bathroom of fondren science Bldg. Too strong to bring to class.
A small child is toddling around the store, holding a coloring book and a shot glass. Thinking of you.
Did you know there's no emoticon to really tell you that I just consumed a magic brownie?
I wanted to be mature but the vodka was resilient.
I feel like an elephant shit on me and left me to be miserable
Honesty, no. I just want to shower you with hot dogs.
She only fucks to metal. I don't know whether to marry her or run for the hills.
I haven't had an orgasm since 2014. So you cam see why I'm having a bad year.
I woke up on the green space outside our dorm cradling a watermelon and sucking my thumb. College is crazy man.
OH MY GOD I AM DYING. AS I WAS TEXTING I JUST BUMPED INTO A MOTHER FUCKING DEER. I AM SHAKING
Wait...Literally? You hit a deer...with your body?!
I PHYSICALLY RAN INTO IT. I FELT ITS WEIRD HAIR AND I EVEN APOLOGIZED CAUSE IT DINDT REGISTER THAT IT WASNT A PERSON. MORTIFIED.
I may or may not have puked near a bear on the side of the road this morning.
Randomize
