just saw my sister at the strip club... dont think she's "taking a night class over the summer"
I'm drinking a margarita out of my 'best bj' trophy and it tastes like victory.
Adams eating in the shower, he says it's one of his favorite places to eat. Btw it's milanos he's eating, he says he loves italy too.
If it's not soft enough to fuck on, then we're not getting the new rug.
I love you. Thanks for all the blowjobs.
Drank a fosters this weekend and last weekend. Listening to down under 5 times a day. Spent 100 dollars on a sleeveless men at work shirt circa 1983. We don't leave for another 5 weeks. I call it pregaming.
It was going alright when lo and behold Tom the cock blocking tornado hits. He is the only man I know who doesn't want anyone to fuck girls.
I don't see how you can turn down creme brulee and orgasms
It was like, once I started flashing you, I couldn't stop.
WE'RE NOT MAKING A DICK PIZZA OKAY
It will be too late. I will have fornicated with the enemy by then.
My blue shorts are now brown from all the stripper fake tan
I woke up naked with a Jason mask on and a fat lip. What happened last night?
Normal people find beers in their gym bag, right?
its 2pm and were already starting beer pong...its gonna be a good night
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