His band may suck, but it's not like I'm sleeping with all of them.
you were sleeping on the floor, then you woke up and told me you were not comfy enough. You took the carpet in the bathroom put it in the bath and you slept there.
It wasn't so much skinny dipping. It more like skinny walking...through a fountain.
If you're wondering why you have playpen balls it's because we stopped at chuckie cheese on the way home.
And then we can spend New Year's Day sprawled across the tiles watching greys anatomy and puking into the bushes over the balcony. It'll be great
She was to tired for head so she opted for a footjob with poor results. I dont want to talk about it
i formally give you permission to eat me when i pass out
His name sounds so important....sounds like the name of my future baby daddy to me.
I think he's hit rock bottom. You know it's a low point in life when you cry because you weren't invited to sit in a box car and watch porn with two other straight dudes.
I'm just trying to absorb as much of the fluids from the carpet as I can.
Update - might be back in your neighbor's good graces. She liked the framed photo I gave her of me on the tractor with my business out.
Dude, I'm not going to use a butt plug.
i just passed i guy i once let listen to me masterbate on the phone...nyc is not big enough
DO NOT TRY TO APPROACH HER CAT. IT IS A DEMON CAT FROM SATAN'S BALLS AND IT *WILL* TRY TO KILL YOU. I SPEAK FROM EXPIRENCE.
ok, muffins say "love me", waffles say "fuck me", got it.
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