Dave a horae rider a coqw boy
You know, it doesn't really count as a walk of shame if you guys showered together the next morning
I'm venturing to your corner of this sin house in t minus 2 minutes.
Immediate regret. She's like a chihuahua on crack.
As his dick went in he shouted GOAL at the top of his voice.
It's fun yes. But hard on the body. I woke up with her purse, socks and one of her shoes in my room. The other shoe was outside. What the fuck were we doing last night?
Less than a month to go... I do not understand how I was able to put up with a roommate who wears bright green Crocs for a year.
Woke up at 10 with bourbon being shoved down my throat and him yelling, "shot train! Don't be a bitch"
So the guy I hooked up with during welcome week just tried to booty call me from across the lecture hall at 9am. I don't think he gets how this works...
She tried to gratify me left handed. Let's just say I've been placed on the 15 day DL.
And i have once again masturbated to an amazing soundtrack. what a time to be alive
Her car is covered in frozen vomit, and she lost her iPhone. I'm also pretty sure I smoked crack last night. Rest in peace 2014.
Never ever make a tattoo bet. I now have a shamrock on my dick.
Sex in a hot air balloon, top that one!
How awkward is it to have the guy you used to sleep with congratulate you on your engagement? I'll tell you. Very.
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