Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
Im handcuffed to some kid i hardly know. there are no cops involved
just went home with some hot chick. she has posters of the jonas brothers in her room. i basically ran out of the house.
Vibrating panties would be amazing during this conversation!
Let's pretend this is a good idea before I change my mind.
He's the equivalent of a body pillow and a dildo. But still funny. We have good pillow talk.
she pinky promised me she was 18
Protocol on turning down a date from someone in the House of Representatives?
He's either jacking off or listening to Kanye West.
We found her on a strangers doorstep chanting "I know someone will let me in" it took 2 of us to drag her to the car.
On a separate note, I just found out some condoms aren't vegan. Problem.
Hahahaha I can't wait for you to ask "wait. are there any animal by products in that?"
Shit on my own feet while puking from my hangover. Is this what 33 is supposed to be like?
I love everything about him! His penis, his hair, his tattoos, his penis, his cat, his penis.
Have you ever looked at someone and thought…oh honey, you're too pretty for an ankle monitor
thank you for the vibrator recommendation, i've come six times today and it's only noon
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