Are you guys doing anything tonight?
Krysta
Dude, I don't think I'll ever be able to find a girl for me...
Is this the gay conversation?
I didn't sleep with her. I'm boycotting arizona and she's from phoenix.
Apparently my gaydar only works on americans. Frenchie capris has two topless chicks in our kitchen making him breakfast.
Tim said I dropped my taco in a puddle and still ate it.
Does the blue bra belong to your sister or cousin?
he needs a life. he was like frothing at the mouth to cockblock you
Well, let's see..I held him while he cried for 30-40 minutes, woke up on his couch AND he gave me a ride home in his underwear. Shit show is not even the half of it.
My chest smells like french fries. Get at me attractive men.
You'd think the neighbors would be used to grown men coming into my house drunk at 230 am.
I slept with the Australian in the bathroom of a gay bar. What has my life become.
There's no triumph quite like finally banging your high school boyfriend 6 years later
I have booze and I wanna give you a bj. How can you be mad at me?
I'd just like to take a moment now to apologize sincerely for getting drunk and making an as of myself at your Christmas party next week. I'm especially sorry for sleeping with your baby sister.
I'm worried about us. We are almost 30 and we still drink jaeger bombs till we black out. Wait, no I'm not. I'm excited about us.
Randomize
