I love that she's always that person who people think it's a good idea to invite her to something. and then she's there and you realize, "nope."
We got so high we made milksteak
I just made out with a girl with a life jacket on wtf is going on
our health teacher's ringtone is Bad Romance and she has a tramp stamp. i will not skip this class, ever.
So let me get this straight. You would sleep with an uncircumcised guy whose name you didn't know, but you won't try the new shrimp taco from taco bell?
I almost caused an explosion; It's okay though. because everyone would have died having a good time.
maybe you should do the old hyperventilate, take a shot of vodka, sniff someone's hair trick
In honor of today being Sunday I am day drinking and watching Grey's Anatomy all day. ALL DAY.
I need something for rope burns and an inner ear infection. Separate incidents, FYI..
I did not have sex with him because he had a puppy…finding out he had a husky pup waiting back at home was just an unexpected plus
I walked in on him pumping himself up by headbanging to the drumbeat from Jumanji.
I spent two entire hours explaining to a guy why I wouldn't make out with him. How was your night?
got a free grilled cheese. Didn't even have to talk about Jesus
What did you do with the dog when you went into the club?
coat checked
I think I'm taking after my dog, I just want to hump everything
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