There is something about drinking on a golf course and getting with younger women that just really makes me feel at home.
isnt it sad that we can reminisce about our childhood but we cant remember shit we did last month
All i know is we had 4 people on a tandum bike, and told the cops we couldnt stop because our momentum was so good.
Why is hotel staff askin about the blood in our room
I had sex with marker all over my face so I can do just about anything.
possibly one of my favorite moments was wiping it off your nose after you high fived a bouncer
This is one of those times I wish I had a time machine so I could go back and punch myself in the face to make me realize what I need to do before it's too late
My walk of shame was four miles long and I had to stop for a water break. I am the picture of class.
Well you fished my watch out of a possibly vomit filled toilet so I think we're bros now.
With everyone putting up pictures of their moms on Facebook it's time to go single MILF hunting.
So, i might have left my morals back in 2011.
Wearing Navy dress whites to a wedding is like having a magical panty removing device. I've never cockblocked a whole room just by existing before.
I need to get some goddam control over my hormones
Anyhow. He gives me orgasms and cuddles and buys me dinner and alcohol. Ill keep him around and cross that other girl bridge when we get there ha ha
What did you spend the night in her closet?
She said she was saving me for breakfast and locked me in there
Randomize
