The new Black Eyed Peas song is the stupidest shit I've heard since the last Black Eyed Peas song.
With sake I got over my irrational fear of seafood. Now I just fear sake.
Thats how high i was. The fact that he looked like Seth Rogan was apparently a good thing.
WHOA. WHOA. WTF. WHOA. TOO HIGH FOR HIM TO BE ENGAGED RIGHT NOW.
oh great, iTunes now thinks im gay.
Thought I woke up to a girl giving me a handy. It was a male nurse inserting a catheter.
Hooking up with him would mean my type has officially become... drug dealer.
i wish i coudl send you meat via computure
Remember the 3 things that are off limits? They're fair game if you get here in the next 5 minutes
why am i naked
you took off your clothes at the party and some guy took them home
WHEN JENDA BENDA THE DRAG QUEEN TELLS YOU TO RUN, YOU RUN, BITCH!!!
I need a beard to bite.
Harry Potter pub crawl tonight. You know you're living your life right when your check list for the evening is wizard robes, wand and acid.
she threw up on her exam, awkwardly wiped it off with her sleeve and continued writing.
What's your fascination with fucking to the Lion King Soundtrack?
Randomize
