Is Jonathan Taylor Thomas a gay? I need you to google search it for me. Its important
Have you ever wondered what your stripper song would be?
she gave me a blowjob during our lunchbreak and expected me not to tell people
Of course it was necessary for me to call the strip club and ask what their shower policy is. Smelled like she was wiping her ass with my eyebrows during that dollar dance.
All I wanted was a hug. You dirty, dirty whore.
Dancing naked to Celine dion - im alive. No better way to start the day
Bro, did you watch that scooby doo porn I sent to you?
FridayRule: If it takes you longer than 5 minutes to find a parking spot, you don't have class today
A drank guy in the ER just sang Trouble to me and when he sang 'Lying on the cold hard ground' he threw himself onto the ground and landed on the wrist he'd just broken. Thirsty Thursday is weird already and it's not even 5.
My gut is currently telling me that Jesus did not intend for us to eat shrimp pad thai on Easter
Is this a considering it or regretting it text?
I just shit out what feels like an entire shrimp with claws and all. You tell me.
"I'm looking more at his dick bulge." Never thought I'd hear those words come out of my boyfriend's mouth.
I'm trying to puke quietly so i don't ruin my grandma's birthday/my graduation brunch. And you say i need to grow up.
the puppy had a little leather gag and was using a ball gag as a fetch toy
have fuck
*fun
actually forget it have a fuck too it'll do you good
"You can have sex in my class, just stay quiet. I don't like noise." My professor... Shall make for an interesting semester.
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