so i realized that everyone figured out i was a slut before i did. then i realized that no one felt like telling me. sometimes i think you just keep me around for entertainment.
you're right.
We dont have to go to dinner or anything gay like that. I just wanna do it.
I absolutely love you.
My boyfriend cheated on me...what do I do?! :( JK IM BREAKIN UP WIT DAT
is it normal that we went to that class once and both got 100's on the final? ohhhh, arizona state.
I should have kept drinking, a coma can't be as bad as this hangover
He is going overseas for 8 months, not only was that blowjob a going away present, but i was supporting the troops
drunkie insisted on stuffing the rest of his scrambled eggs in his pockets before we left ihop. we really should have left a better tip
hiding in a bush to avoid a seven dollar cab ride. cabby got out a flashlight and looked for us for like an hour. help.
You said you were going inside to sober up and then you poured yourself a wine glass of warm gin
I keep telling girls I work at the carnival and then guessing their weights. I'm pretty sure I'm about to get kicked out.
I just slow jerked to the titanic theme song, i dont think theres enough alcohol in the state to get me over her tonight
You are NEVER going to guess whose penis was JUST in my mouth!!!
I'll give you a hint, we ate paste with him in kindergarten.
Using the random money I found in my bra from Halloween to pay to print my bio notes. I only brought a debit to the bar. College win.
Pssh I just bang a girl in a single person tent. Thats like the back seat of a sedan.
I smell like a brewery and I have been drinking for 7 hours. This seems like a perfect time to tell my husband I want a divorce.
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