Saw a dead body on the way to the casino. I think that's a good sign.
and then she said I drew a line on her forehead with my cum and whispered "Simba"
Dude. I tried to convince her to eat poprocks and give me a blowjob. It did not work out well.
Vegas is awesome. Its like you have a kentucky accent girls automatically assume you don't have herpes.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
complete strangers are now referring to me as 'the bourbon guy.' i can live with this.
I was about to smoke a bunch of weed and lay naked while I cried all day
He came into your room last night to tell me he was leaving, when I woke up this morning he was facedown in your hallway. He didn't make it very far.
Only the gays. Guy gives me a handjob in the steam, then changes next to me under his towel
Only the gays
My mom sucked on that joint like a nipple and she was a fucking newborn
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Whatever you have to do, STALL THEM. Your toothbrush is in the kitchen, my pants are on the balcony, and I don't have eyebrows.
The man at the checkout said "Somebody's not fucking around".
It's gonna be a good night
Just slather his penis with BBQ sauce
PANTIES FOUND
You might see me up a tree with a deranged look in my eye , just walk away at that point
I'm literally watching a webcam of the Vegas strip right now and it is making me sad.
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