He walked in and put an x made out of tape on the floor. He then announced that he was going to pass out there. Cocky or strategic?
I'm cheering for the colts this year. I basically have to since my fake says i'm from indianapolis
I'm telling you the guy came in bought a box of condoms and all three of the chicks that came in behind him followed him to his car. I want his life
So many lesbians keep hitting on me. I'm about to give up and just go home with the manliest one.
you said you wanted to feel how much my penis weighed for educational purposes
My parents called me out on catching us walking home from the bar in a swimming motion because "it was too windy to walk" home...
Who was the person who brought the rooster when they won @ beer pong
I messaged him asking for his address. He replied with the address then said, "If you're gonna stalk me, I'm the third window on the side and usually get naked around 8am and anytime randomly after 6pm (listen for music).. If you're sending anthrax, I'm 6'2" 225lbs so send a good amount."
2 hours later, she made her cat watch the waterfall scene from Homeward Bound to teach her how good she has it here.
He's a fucking asshole. Who gives good head. And seriously I have never seen someone less committed to hair color
It's Been a while since I puked in vomit bush. I hope it doesn't feel neglected
Just FYI....you totally yelled out Royals while we were having sex last night lol.
Thank you for helping a fellow gay friend today. You are sublime and deserve free tickets to the Ellen show
Ughh I think I'll just sit here in the dark and wallow in self-pity while drinking wine and knitting scarves for my future cats.
My New Year's resolution consists of less weekday hangovers, more sex, and more money.
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