Lost. The hour! Funtime!!!!
literally followed a trail of condoms to the bus stop this morning. Ahh modern-day bread crumbs
So he handed us the weed then asked us if we needed any papers. And she goes "i dont know what that means, do we need to sign something?"
Chipotle chips and wine for breakfast. Its def game day
Did I hear correctly when it sounded like he said "just don't let me throw up into your vaj?"
I like to think I'd be good at dodging genitalia.
Before I roll over explain to me why you're naked and on my floor.
Finished sriting an apology letter to my liver 2 weeks before st. Patricks game on
That's actually a fantastic idea... The kinky sex dungeon will be vastly improved by the addition of a lightsaber
after further investigation i found out he's a little bit married..
New wedding record, my shirt was off by 8pm!!!
We found him. He was passed out in a McDonalds booth with at least 6 big Mac wrappers. The employee said he kept yelling that he was in America and had the freedom to have big macs. Fucking Italians...
he spent an hour trying to rescue a bug from the sink. turned out to be a sesame seed.
How does fucking Canada get Justin Good Guy Take Me Now, Just Fuck Me In The House of Commons Trudeau, and our new President looks like he bathes in cheetoh dust and sin?
I don’t care how cute or big a guy is I’m done with drunken hand jobs. It was like I was pulling a nine inch bungee cord for 25 minutes. Now My arm and shoulder is dead
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