So called my VP's house on Sunday drunk and told him that if he didn't hire me for the new position I would skull fuck his wife. They asked me to go home today. Thanks again Vodka
we've reached the level in our friendship where i don't think he would rape me
kill, fuck, marry: alice cullen, hermione granger, ginny weasley.
damn... fuck alice for sure, I feel bad but i think I have to say marry ginny... and kill hermoine! I can't believe I'm answering this right now.
I'm destined to be knocked up by a sailor
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
How many times a week can a couple have a threesome with the same guy before it becomes some sort of 3-way relationship?
Some guy stole lobsters by hiding them in his pants. We should strive to be like him.
Correct me if I'm wrong, but did you let me pee in the grass while barking? And also, how many of you have videos?
No more jager for that guy. He jacked the neighbor kids big wheel, rode around making jet noises, then passed out behind the wheel and rolled it and broke his wrist
I have a hunch Mama J got around.
Am I allowed to say that about my own mom?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He got the life proof phone case so he could jack off in the shower without his wife knowing
Well you got kicked off a stripper pole. They said girls only.
My grandma just invited me to gate crash a funeral for the free food. Priorities.
Your youporn search history says otherwise.
wait you fucked a guy who wears k-swiss? seriously?
I know, im living my 7th grade dream
I just want to nap all the time and eat Chinese food.
Randomize