I will be horny for about another two hours. Feel free to call me until then.
We succumbed to passion, and then he had to go meet his girlfriend. End of story.
My professor just suggested making the state of the union more interesting by turning it into a drinking game. Brilliant!!
at least he lost his v-card with a bang... or should i say the clap.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the guy in the stall next to me, came in, farted, laughed, and proceeded to give himself some sort of hillbilly pep talk that included the phrase "big pussy".
it was really awkward meeting your mom for the first time while i was still wearing the condom we were using.
Im about to embark on a date with someone who shit in my car. How did this become my life?
Haha, you avoided her at all costs. And then she shoved her tits in your face
I believe nudity is frowned upon at that establishment
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You're not on my level until you shop at Petsmart for sex accessories.
So apparently using the emergency exit of the bar as a bathroom is frowned upon in this establishment...
Dude are you being arrested? I swear I just saw you laying on the hood of your car with a cop patting you down...
You lit a fire in my vagina no man can extinguish.
I just tried to brush my hair with a can opener. Who gave you that brownie
The part of "Dave" will now be played by "Rob." Rob, why don't you unzip and show Dave why that is.
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