how do you clear previous safari searches on an iPhone? i asked my brother to google something for me and "big penis" "empire chinese food" and "reverse cowgirl" popped up.
Just watched 1 guy 1 jar with my mom. Awkwardville...
Don't get me started, it sucks when the one thing you have in common with a girl is not wanting penis inside you.
I found your twin in sf. His name is ryan. And you are the evil one.
just found out my horoscope sign is scales. it's like i was destined to be a drug dealer
he emptied an entire bag of goldfish onto the bed and rolled around yelling the theme to jaws trying to eat them
Afterwards she kept poking it and saying "it looks so sad and small" I dont know if I wanted to reach this state in our relationship...
Dude she has the ugliest blow job face ever.
Fucking him was like shopping for my first training bra.. Embarrassing yet extremely useful
can we get vodka so I have an excuse for being an emotional wreck
Dear future Eric, sorry about the Everclear. Sincerely, Eric +2 shots E.C.
Can't talk, ducks in the car
What do you mean not that crazy? I had sex last night. with my\nBOSS. in the restaurant where we WORK.... ON A DINNER TABLE.
my mom just came into my room and handed me a news paper article about women on the verge of a drinking problem... i can already tell its not about to be sunday funday
Is there a way to use porn to inspire him to have dirty thoughts? Like the movie Inception except with more lube and orgams?
Randomize
