I made a mac n' cheesicle. Better in my head than in real life. Gonna keep smoking to see if it gets better.
I'm so ready for finals. She finally agreed to skypesex me from spain so now i'm up until 4am studying every morning waiting for her to get online
my mom just asked me, concerned, if I swallowed.
K. On the way. I need a drink.
Like a drink drink or like water?
Have we met?
Just realized that St. Patty's is on a Saturday this year in case you were interested in coming to New York and redefining bender with me.
I found him in his pink and white boxer out side the dorm hall and the only thing he said was "it wouldn't let me in"
Before we rave about the healing powers of your penis, remember it nearly killed me as well.
My mouth is so dry that I'm about to put a straw in a jar of Vaseline and chug. This all addi diet definitely has its ups and downs.
I'm just more comfortable with the bondage
11% beer and firearms, what could possibly go wrong?
All right, sex is off the menu for you. Now you just get friendship. So I can spend marginally less time being annoyed by you.
I feel as though my head has drastically changed shape
We were like ok let's be eachothers maid of honor and then you were like "ok see you at the wedding" and walked away
I was sleeping and woke up in the bathroom already puking like i slept walk. Perrrrrrfect.
i was in class looking for a pencil and found a chicken strip in my back pack. i think i might have a problem.. sad thing is i ate it
Randomize
