What kind of poor, pathetic town do we live in where a horny teenage girl is sitting in her basement on a saturday night, unlaid?
aparently we are going to have sex infront of her friend. ill call you tomorrow
It's true- you can buy beer at McDonald's in France. I'm not coming back to the States.
Just saw a baby with a T-shirt that read "I am the result of my mother forgetting to take her magic pills". I can't believe they make shit like that.
She crushed my hand with the box spring last time, so it's all good.
Just orgasmed in traffic. Starting to have feelings for my commute.
Sorry if this is weird, but please don't have sex in my truck. I get to be the first...
I don't know where he learned to eat pussy but I thought I was going blind
I just moved 6 traffic cones blocking a row of traffic. I got applause.
with great strapon comes great responsibility.
Watching a bear prancing around in a tiara is worth a loss of bar time.
I feel like asking for a towel for after I puke before I puke to be more respectful than jus going outside to puke and coming back inside covered in sweat and tears.
That's pretty intense. There aren't many people I would pick over a burrito
Yeaaaaa...im super disgusted with myself lol...which is interesting, considering all of the things I have done in my life...
She yelled “outlaw country” right before we heard the police siren
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