walked right past julianne moore (on her walk of shame this morning) god i love new york. :)
wouldnt it be awesome if walks of shame were like charity walks...you could get sponsors and shit and donate money to curing STDs or cancer
Had a dream I was a monkey and smoked pot out of a bong made out of a tree
Maybe I should forgo underwear.
This is a family BBQ no?
Everything is fine now . The coast guard said we just can't take the inflatable trampling out past the break way anymore
it would be cheaper just to buy a dildo to intimidate people with.
They evidently had to pull his penis out of me while we were passed out on the floor.
I need more social interactions that don't involve sex
I'm facebook/twitter stalking the guy I just slept with as he's passed out next to me. What a time to be alive...
If I were better looking, this would be the point where I'd resign myself to stripping.
He had a cruise ship of a dick and I need to set sail on that ocean again
He was awesome with her today. I can't say that it didn't make my Fallopian tubes sing "The Hills Are Alive."
eating a weed cupcake with nutella on top at work. i AM a star!
I threw up soo much that I started crying. Then his grandma randomly came in and started rubbing my back...
So I guess I walked across campus with "pat my ass" in sharpie on my forehead.
You deserve it, you colossal cock block.
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