the night i cant remember will be the night i always remember thanks to my "i
M and I are hungry and we are making your pizza in the fridge. But you're having sex and we're not so we dont feel bad.
it feels good to walk into a CVS and not go straight to the pharmacy counter for plan b. its been a while....
its been so long even thinking about having a dick inside me makes me sore
I seriously think my heart may fail. And I didn't even grab a toilet beer :(
My month off booze swimsuit season diet plan is working well. Plus I'm learning so much about my house, did you know a girl named Meagan lives here?
I'm semi drunk. I just bought you penis moisturizer. Not kidding. Keep an eye out for the package. Merry Christmas.
Pregnancy test = positive. Hope you still have our old guess who game 'cause daddy elimination begins now.
One of your snapchats was of you with a 40oz of Mickeys and the caption: "Deep Throat back in her natural habitat"
I'm doing an Uber ride of shame in a red, white and blue bikini top and America shorts. Good for me.
She said "I feel like I haven't reached my full potential" and I couldn't figure if she meant in life or with the weed..
I'm very aware of my heart moving the blood in my body.
I just interrupted this girl giving a dude head in a parked car on the south side. Going down on your guy while you're parked in front of your house because you don't want your parents catching you is fine by me, just don't block the fire hydrant.
skyped with him for 45 min in the bath while i shaved my legs. new level in the relashionship
Just saw you run by my class yelling "fuck you!". Good luck and stay human!
Randomize
