sometimes i wish i had a whole other life to spend on youtube
Dude, I think my check liver light just came on
You then began crawling around in the grass with a magnifying class saying you were searching for the magic school bus.
You kept making up "snapple facts" every time you opened a beer.
I need to have sex with you on our hotel room window ledge... This is a need not a request.
all i remember is him tryin to explain to the girls how to effectively hit the strip club with their bfs
hes actually pretty persuasive when he drinks
Find out what day classes start and I will come down to Richmond that weekend. Any broad who claims to be 18-21 will be promptly ID'd. My job has trained me to spot a fake from a mile away, and I don't need a statutory rape charge.
Home safe. Took me everything not to stop and pick up some random cat that looked like an ocelot tho.
I'd rather take 10 virginities than catch something. Right now I should be good, I mean the sex with Jake was so bad he can't possibly have an std
I'm not trying to be dramatic but if someone makes you choose between getting a Brazilian or dying. For the sake of your sanity just fucking die
I just want my birth control to stop making me feel like I'm watching baby seals get clubbed to death any time anything even remotely unpleasant happens lol
You showed your tits for hundreds of beads but magically became shy when there was food on the line
we told you you couldn't get your dick sucked because you were a girl and you yelled at us and said we were 'discriminating you'
Just sitting at dinner with my dad...simultaneously texting "daddy" to confirm saturday's spanking and telling another guy to get condoms before Im done with dinner. Don't know when I got so ate up but I'm loving it. You?
Regretting asking you what you were doing.
Just told my roommate about "analvice" and she is horrified and the Sound of Music is ruined.
Randomize
