you broke into my aparment at three in the morning wearing long johns and offered me beer.
bought some hannah montana deodorant. hope it doesnt make me smell untalented
i've never seen someone fall down the steps so gracefully... i think im in love
I'm beginning to think I'm sterile because I definitely should be pregnant by now.
I'm at the gas station where we got beef jerky and condoms. The fact that those two are in the same sentence makes me love you more.
If I die I am blaming you for not answering to tell me the proper dosage of horse tranquilizers to take
That's two mile stones in one shot. A ginger and that's my third ashley.
At this point the smell of shame has become my natural musk
Omg. The news was on TV while I was giving him a bj...when the weatherman said its a beautiful start to December, he groaned and said it sure is.
Don't blame me. I told you I didn't know if I had a key to those hancuffs.
Then he started caressing my eye brow. Like repetedly. For at least 15 minutes. It was strangely mesmerizing
You sent me a naked picture of you as a child? How is that normal
best way to lose double chin? blow jobs. I am fucking hurting.
The guy I made out with the other night fed me chipotle favored funions and I thought it was true love when I was drunk.
I have wine with a bendy straw bitches I can do fucking anything
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