Help. Asians are flirting in front of me(773): They speak asian
I'm a terrible person. There are two guys speaking sign language on the metro platform and at first I thought they were drunk and doing a silly dance.
What's the point of having 3 fuck buddies when their periods all seem to sync up
I really wanna punch him. Right in his cell-phone-sized penis
He woke up next to me, said I "wasn't naked enough" and fell back asleep. I proceeded to blow him.
She is crazy, dude. She actually bit me on the gootch.
I threw up in the shower, slipped, and fell in it. Should I try and continue my day or just get back in bed?
I'm lying topless with an eye infection at the foot of my bed with a dog between my legs. With disney in the background. Its one of those 3 am moments
I am 100% planning on being drunk on Wednesday. This is America. Work or no work.
He took off his priest costume and proceeded to dryhump the teletubby.
How much more is Amanda Bynes going to rip out our hearts?!?!?
Where are you on a scale from one to wasted?
Like alphabetically I'd say a v
Like Is it appropriate to tell your boss you banged a guy in the back of a truck at a wedding? Probably not.
You took one look at him and said "let's hope I don't remember this tomorrow" then you took another shot and chased it with a beer.. I guess it was a success.
bonging vodka is the same level of "good idea" as eating machetes
Randomize
