Hey I don't know if you will get this but all I know is you are so beautiful to .ee and? I dare anyone to stop me me from caring for you ante so beautiful so I kid you not gorgeous iyoiu are so beautiful to me i dare som.eone too stioo you
This hotel is not contributing to my sobriety, they have 4 kinds of free wine and beer.
He introduced me to his parents as the girl he made out with on Thursday night...
I put labels all over the house on things I think are mine. A cactus, the dog, and a bottle of wine.
I'm sober enough to question why I have your name as "the wolverine" in my phone.
And by "hammer out the details" you know I mean spending 20 minutes on wedding plans then getting wine drunk, right?
So the keyword here is "hammered"?
I'm doing blow on my fuzzy rug
Come join me
We have bigger issues at hand... Does anybody know someone in the kalamazoo area that is missing a pair of stilts ?
not even kidding I just received the single most greatest head I have ever had.. It was unreal. It was like stick my dick into a silk bag of puppy ears.
Thursday could be nutella day. You could make me a nutella sandwich and then fuck me senseless
Just walked by a girl saying to her friend "honestly you coulda given me any dude and I woulda fucked him"
You should've introduced yourself
I have a black eye again and dont know why again
He just said "I know you want my cock" and I said nah. I want food bro
His parents then knew me as the blackout who took care of him and stole his watch
Fuck. I think I can already feel tomorrow's hangover. It's like future me cane back to warn present me about the impending doom but didn't turn the time dial back far enough.
Randomize
