so it turns out you can rearrange the letters in "scottsdale" to spell "milf city." who knew?
Dude michael jackson died, guess he's not 'stayin aliveee' any longer.
Uh dude that wasn't a michael jackson song it was the BGs
i wish starbucks made bloody marys
Whenever I miss you I just turn on Tool Academy
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Playing drinking games to Nancy Grace totally counts as "keeping up with current events.."
we were doing it doggy-style and i felt him pop that pimple on my back.I have mixed feelings about it
Well when you're drinking tequila mixed with water out of a steve Austin cup I really don't think acquiring a straw is your main priority
Woke up handcuffed to a half gallon of beam. Yep. This is my life.
Crying in the liquor store is not a good look
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Tell your friends I said hi and that if they touch your penis I'll cut off their hands.
how did operation slutty penguin go?
pretty epic. there was a guy who was also dressed as a penguin. i asked him if he would keep my eggs warm while i went fishing for the winter
I just wish I had a snapshot of his attempted front flip off the bar. There are some things that are worth getting a life ban for, and the moment of impact with his foot and that lady's face was one of those things.
He handcuffed himself to the keg... D is hooking up with him anyway.
The bartender has no bra and is giving out free shots. Call mom I'm getting married.
oh. oh my god. i just had lunch with my mom with semen still on my face.
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