this mix will be the most desperate cry for affection in the history of itunes.
You stumbled in the house, mumbled something about a cheese party, grabbed a block of cheese and the whiskey, and left.
Please high five our old drug dealer for me please.
Why i have shady connections. Owner just txt me asking to come by and judge the new stripper.
What does puking wasabi feel like?
Like snorting cocaine backwards.
All I remember is a very aggressive two-stepper who inadvertently made me give myself a black eye with my own beer
Did i tell you that he's legal and i got his number? Because he's legal and i got his number. THIS BITCH AIN'T GOING TO JAIL YET
It was going very smoothly until she noticed my boner of hope.
Cant leave im designed bacon maker you come here
And then before we had sex he was quoting space jam to me
Tbh I would eat a grilled cheese off your dick.
Dude 4th of July week was our like 5th anniversary of you sending me dick pics ❤️
So Blakes coming home... so if youre like fingerbanging the shit out of yourself on the kitchen table...wrap it up
beggars cant be choosers....im desperate and he has a dick. he checks all the boxes.
I'm sitting in the car vaping at an elementary school to try and deal with the stress of existing. About how i thought being 30 would go for me tbh
Randomize