yeah it was kind of like, i'm 27 and still live in a frat house.. you honestly expect me to have "moral fiber" and a "conscience"
I walked in on my roommate finishing watching something on his computer. There was cum all over his screen. He awkwardly said hi and pulled up his pants.
im starting to measure my showers by the number of beers i drink while im in there.
Midgets have it so easy. They have so much less leg area to shave.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
And next time please put a text between discussing my orgasms and discussing your son - that was weird.
I kept trying to give you water and you kept spitting it back at me. You looked like a camel. People were staring
Yes. Yes. Double yes. I'll bring the tits. You bring the frosting.
I gave him 3 xanax and recorded the ball drop. He's gonna think tonight is New Years.
I woke up naked on his boat with a cowboy hat on with a boat cover over me... Thank you tequila!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just realized that I have dated 5 unemployed guys...and 3 that drove pt cruisers...Turns out I do have a type.
saying, "have a good fall!" After fucking a virgin boy is good etiquette, right?
If I'm going to keep blacking out this much I need to start taking more pictures.
She looked so much better when u didn't look at her and the music was too loud to hear her
I think vodka/water/skittles totally beats your crystal light mimosas
Black labs can get you to do pretty much anything...even approach strange men in their bath robes
Randomize