Only in Montana can you find Septic Services that would display "Christian owned and operated" on the side of the truck. I'm oddly going to miss this state.
meet me or not, i'm out of control
Hey I have to teach you how to run in heels before vegas
Just took my birth control pill next to the cubicle where we had sex last semester.
As I fucked him you stood outside my door screaming, "I'M NOT JUDGING YOU!" over and over.
I was judging you.
The Supreme Court upheld health insurance. If that's not an excuse to get hospital drunk, I don't know what is.
I'm holding onto the sink for dear life. Pretty sure if Iet go I'll turn into a shit propelled man rocket.
You don't know commitment until you try and waterproof a non-waterproof vibrator
He wanted me to blow him while he did curls and looked at himself in the mirror. Not sure if gay or ego maniac.
If you're funny as hell and have a mustache, odds are I'm probably gonna fuck you
He took me out, we slept together, and he sent me home this morning with fresh cantaloupe. #husbandstatus
And he's a cuddle champ. I know because I slept over because I don't know what boundaries are.
I drank so much that my feet don't feel like my feet
i swear a herd of elephants who like to smoke weed lives directly above our room
i cant go to his party cause last time i pressed the red buttons on the wall and the fire alarm went off for 40 minutes, i'm not allowed back there
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