Im wearin a dollar bill hat and tgkin a big girl home. Lifi is gmwnd
too bad you live with your parents still
i just realized i put more money and effort into 420 then i did for christmas
what started as sign language exam pre-drinks to calm the nerves turned into me waving at a deaf woman for 20 minutes
The woman at the bus stop told me i smell delicious and asked if i wear cotton then proceeded to tell me about her shellfish allergy
No The bastards made me buy a new one, They don't cover water damage an apparently they consider salsa water damage
Do you know how to give stiches?
I do not...this text concerns me
I'm a hopeless romantic that likes rough sex. Judge me
the best part was at the strip club when he said he was "here to pick up my wife. she's up on stage.....wait that's my aunt". only in Ottawa.
So ive come to the realization that my affinity for tattooed guys makes me the literal definition of tit for tat
Just please try not to piss Danny off, I really can't afford to find a new drug dealer again
You need to finger her with the Spock hand sign since she loves Star Trek.
He radiates elegant sexual dominance. I bet even his balls have pinstripes.
You have ten minutes starting with this message to get here. Or I'm putting my clothes back on.
Sextember may be over, but Cocktober is just beginning!!!
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