i wants your nipples near my face. PLEASE????
a drug dealer just gave me his business card. it had his face on it drinking a 40oz
She's a Laker fan, her sister is a Celtic fan... no matter who wins I'm getting a celebration bj from one of them!
I feel like I had eight dicks in my mouth
This is the way my sobriety ends: Not with a bang, but with a whimper.
Everything in my purse is 100% saturated in red wine, which made it challenging to cover up my booze breath with franzia soaked gum
It's also dangerous to ride a bike down the stairs after a few beers, but I've done it.
They wouldn't let me hang out the sun roof and sing apple bottom jeans in the drive thru of hardee's i think i no longer like these ppl
Why would you hook up with someone whos known for peeibg in someones mouth
So, seriously. How does it feel to know that you're riding a cock that was in kindergarten when you were going to prom?
Nothing can teach you regret more efficiently than a wine hangover.
He is such a generous lover, I can look past the fact his name is fucking Bob.
We watched playoff games and fucked so we could both see the TV. I've now found true love.
You don't get to call me bro after you've had your dick in me.
I just timed my pee with a stop watch. From when the main stream started to ended. It was 45.1 seconds. This is the truth trust me.
Randomize
