i want tt clbm rinabw nd ride uncrn
what?
i wnt tto climb a rainboww and ride a unicornnnnnnnnn
There is somethin about your sexuality that makes my dick do jumping jacks when I see you
new low.... made out with someone while peeing
Bank of America texted me 7 times in 12 hours to say my balance was below $50. I kept transfering money back in. Then I texted my bank saying that it was okay, i knew what I was doing.
just overheard a conversation that ended in "and that's what I learned in France" How could that not have been about sex
she made a facebook for her toddler.. his likes include lil wayne and ice luge. He has more friends than i do. I mean, Seriously? there's not enough booze in the world to make thanksgiveing bearable
The countdown is at hand. We are 15 days from so much Jameson that names will be forgotten. Prepare your liver now or severe projectile vomiting will be the theme of the night.
I may or may not be wearing slippers and a TMNT hat. This thing better not have a dress code.
Random thought: what if being devoured by animals was a death penalty option...and you got to choose the animal?
He must have found my secret supply of blow and took a bump before we left the house. Rude.
He could of at least asked
The last thing I searched on my phone was "leave in conditioner on cats." This is where my life is.
He couldn't give me an orgasm, but he did give me a UTI.
The candles are lit, the magic circle is drawn, now all we need to do is get naked and see how many orgasms we can manage.
I just made a dick pic collage. Let me just tell you,there is no comparison to the latest!
We did hand stuff while watching teenage mutant ninja turtles so I guess you could say it's getting serious
Randomize