i can't believe i never thought of this: farticle man
i failed horribly. studying for that final was as pointless as Vinnie is to Jersey Shore
10 dollar pizza all the toppings you want. Wait Until You See This Pizza
last night was the icing on my 3 week vodka binge cake
they're using the ping pong table for ping pong. it's weird
shes still here... layin in my bed watching a beyonce concert on tv drinking leftover franzia straight outta the bag and crying
Did you just reference Ludacris during my possible pregnancy scare of 2012?!
im currently assessing the tequila situation in preparation of your arrival
how are you shocked you fucked her? sure shes hot, but she also washed your beerpong balls in her mouth..... you should probably get tested.
The cops walked in and cracked up bec he was passed out on the couch in a pink tutu.
Today, my weed came in a pokéball. I officially love my dealer.
I JUST SENT A TOILET SELFIE TO THE WRONG PERSON.
I know it's 10:30am but Finding Dory starts in an hour, and I have four points of molly. You down?
I'm driving to work hungover. I feel like I got hit by a train and then drank that train too.
I may have dislocated my hip getting fucked on the bathroom counter
Randomize
