we are driving next to a guy driving and masturbating while looking at a naked magazine. I love LA
We learned about herpes today in bio. I might as well have given the lecture
casually drinking alone with your cats. do they like sparks?
The best part of my day was getting high in the parking lot of the movie theater and taking pics in the photo booth with the caption "CONGRATULATIONS!" we geeked out because it congratulated us for getting high
I needed a test subject that didn't know any of my friends so that if i screwed up no one would really know or spread rumours about how it was the worst bj ever
I'm doing shots of jagger in dixi cups and making a lesson plan for my 8th grader summer school class. My life is so close to adulthood I can taste it
Lesson learned. Kayak oars are not golf clubs....check
Yes she was blowing me but I couldnt see her face. The only light was from the sparklers she asked me to hold. I love 4th of July.
You don't know how emotionally damaged I am from crashing into that park maintenance van. I'll never ride a bike because of it.
So are we just not going to talk about the time I came home to you jerking it in the kitchen?
I found out my butt plug has a metal core at the airport security checkpoint...
No. Every time we go there, you end up getting high, then lost, then going home with strangers.
PUT DOWN THE JOINT AND STEP AWAY FROM THE TRUSTAFARIAN
In other news, I’ve officially fucked a grandpa.
As I walked across the lawn after the party got busted, an officer told me to chug my beer before I left the premises.
Randomize
