Puking in one of the stalls, a guy ran in and started puking in the other stall... In between heaves we told each other our names; i found out that it was my old best friend that moved away in the 8th grade
didn't know how to tell his mom I was confused about how long we'd been together because we banged for a full year before making it official
Honestly, I don't care whether it was a guy or a girl. Best blowjob ever.
I have no idea what happened last night, but you're the only person I remember smashing my face into. Be honored.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This girl brought half a watermelon to class. I want to be on her level.
She answered the door wearing a blanket and holding a golf club. I was too late for this party.
Jail wasn't bad. Was poppin Xanax the whole way there
Just come here and visit. Enjoy the deliciousness of me being legal. Just don't think, and come here right meow. meow meow meow.
not saying it was a bad idea to throw an impromptu party but someone stole the microwave
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You know it was a good night when you're lying on the couch in your pjs at 4pm having a pitcher of ice water for breakfast.
Apparently when your theatre teacher asks who the best actor of our time is, Nicolas Cage is not the right answer.
My manager said you offered to make out with him to ensure I keep my job if I didn't show up to work today
The zoom feature on snap chat videos is the worst thing to ever happen to sexting
I just used my citation as a bookmark. Want a beer?
I added our drug dealer to the quickbooks software babe, he is listed under vendor's as an expense category... money management is such a bitch...
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