i think i just was awoken by the sound of my roommate choking on her boyfriend's dick
Omg just want to confirm: got drunk, naked in street, fucked in bathroom and puked on bart.
in the practice room. just found 3 bottles of smirnoff hidden inside the piano. SO glad i didn't get into berklee...
ok, I understand that your bathroom door is broken, but at least close the blinds next time you take a shit. The entire parking garage just watched you.
I just got hit on by my highschool french teacher. I need to stop going to this bar.
And I'm supposed to be surprised that you got another concussion?
we're almost there. Shes pounding on the car window telling the nurse whos on a smoke break to fuck off.
I saw someone get arrested while I was moving out...this has to be a good sign.
Good for him. He wanted to accomplish walking across niagara, I'm hoping to accomplish not throwing up tomoro nite, we all have our own priorities in life.
These are all good points. But, I think your under estimating what it's like to be held upside down for a standing 69
He tried to stop traffic by waving his half eaten pizza at cars.... And we were stupid enough to cross .....??!!!
I didn't know what to say so I just sent him a chicken emoji
To this day, I regret not having sex in the bathroom
is buying liquor on my lunch break too aggressive?
Is it totally acceptable to fuck a co-worker even though we don't speak the same language?
Why do you even have to ask me that question
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