How was your Memorial Day?
Don't remember... but I do have an American flag painted on my boob signed by a Staff Sargent... Oh God, I hope that's his military rank and not a nick name.
So i just found out i replied to my room mates craigslist ad. Akward
I was so hungover that I had to stop in the middle of the game and throw up. The fans cheered.
you thought your balls were fighting each other...
According to the bell hop, we stumbled in about 4 and then cannon balled into the pool.
I'm still tasting pancake mix. I think this may actually be a serious medical problem...
My birthday was already very memorable but her punching me in the face put it over the top. I love being 25 and still not giving a fuck.
I got another blow job proposal last night. Skills.
NO SHITSVILLE I just saw a homeless dude punch a pigeon that flew by him
I feel as if I need Plan B just being in the same room as them for more than 5 minutes.
Pennsylvania now holds the distinct honor of being the third state I've crapped my pants in.
unless you want this visit to have a different tone... more romantic, less molly in a hotel room
just saw two mice fucking on our bed...i think its time to find a new place to live
i found a picture from last night of you sat on the floor naked, covered in butter and crying. care to explain?
I was hoping you could tell me..
I'm like the kinda excited when David After Dentist stands up in his seat, screams, and collapses
Randomize
