Potential corruption. He's 19.
Get them while they're young!
Remember when the only STD we had to worry about were hickies? Those were the days
when I woke up she was standing in the living room with a bottle of scotch because she is "allergic to hangovers"
Dude i thought about you literally the second after I came. This friendship is starting to cross some serious boundaries
Im wearing all my glow sticks to bed so i know where my arms are at all times.
Sometimes I hate my life and then I remember I live in the WORLD CAPITAL OF RUM
People...there is no better feeling in the world than finding out via Google that your ex has a warrant out for his arrest. No better feeling.
Just got a snapchat from him that was a video of with the caption "my new apartment" in Brazil. I think we might not be seeing eachother anymore.
I don't know about this Sanders guy after all. I'm voting for MYSTERY BABYLON, WHORE OF ALL THE EARTH
Hillary?
I'm driving to his house to eat chicken and hopefully have an orgasm
I smell like Dick and happiness
I'm literally about to create a tinder account. Just so someone drives me to get food.
everything I love is going to destroy me, so if coconuts are the answer, so be it.
Just showered and cleaned every bit of sex off of me cuz i have a feelin my stepmom has jesus powers and would be able to smell it on me
.......do you have the salami in bed? I'm trying to make a sandwich.
Randomize
