Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(781): View more from Massachusetts

Fucking love it maybe bedazzle some baby seals? Make them cuter? Who would club a bedazzled baby seal? Only a fucking monster.

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(503): View more from Oregon

You gave him your vagina and this is what I get in return? This is bullshit!

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(979): View more from Texas

I found a girl on our couch wearing lederhosen this mornig... I dont know if i should be impressed or ashamed

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(419): View more from Ohio

Henry's handball, Tiger Wood's Car Crash, Roger Federer losing ... That's it....I'm throwing my Gillete away

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(314): View more from Missouri

He suggested abortion before I finished the sentence. That was my plan too, but now I feel like should keep it just to prove how big of a dick he is.

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(815): View more from Illinois

he keeps trying to sext me and all I can do is respond with descriptions of what im eating.

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(702): View more from Nevada

As she was leaving she said "You have an awesome penis, I hope to use it again soon" I need that on a business card to hand out at the bar

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(267): View more from Pennsylvania

It's Breast Cancer Awareness Month!!!! What random hook up should check my tata's this year?!?!

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(516): View more from New York

The highlight of my week is I found some hetero porn I didn't completely hate. Branching out.

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