Cut to me doing the walk of shame to work from a hotel.
i didnt think "maybe you should take over" was a good thing to say when i couldnt get it up
So it sounded like a midget was barfing IN our walls again this morning ...
He leaned over in the middle of the movie and said "My dick's name is Juan". WHO DOES THAT?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Im the proud new owner of the campus speed bump sign
you puked in the bathtub and said "let them pee"
Sexting across continents is really a perfect example of how far technology has come.
I just bought the spice girls album. We will be doing music videos in the near future. You are our baby spice-- don't fight it
It's accurate though. I am legitimately passionate about pickles. I crave pickles the same way I crave sex. It is a deep rooted animalistic need
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hi please disregard the last text and if you'd like our entire interaction
Done
Whatever. I'll take my new fine ass dick sucking nails elsewhere.
ELLEHCIM
NYRMAK
DRAHCIR
WHAT??
Turns out I tore my ACL when I fell off the mechanical bull.. Happy bday to me
lmao he sent me a snapped but i'm afraid to open.
i think i have dick pic PTSD.
There was one thing about my NYC trip I forgot to tell you: I took a dump in Trump Tower
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