Im too awkward for one night stands. I need to hire someone to come clear them out of my bed before I wake up.
is it trashy that while he was throwing up in the bathroom, i was hooking up with his childhood best friend?
she just gave her compliments to the chief, at dennys
Apparently you need a permit for a flamethrower.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Gonna send a picture of my negative pregnancy test with the message "Merry Christmas" to the guys I've been sleeping with. That alone, will put a huge dent in my shopping list of gifts for people.
Like really my mothers day gift is a pic of his dick
There was a trampoline and tequila. It was glorious.
I have the starring role in a literal shit show.
Oh I know babe. You're shining beacon of adult responsibility. That's why I go down on you.
I go down on you because abs
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I hurt myself, but I'm pretty sure I saved the carpet.
*6am blends another margarita* *615am blends straight tequila*
Same encounter she body slammed me to the floor and than humped me
I am mentally ready for anal.
No one knows how to work that "I pulled a muscle in my leg" drunk swagger like you can
He couldn’t find my clit with a map. Literally. I drew him a map.
Randomize