porn star on stage now. Get unkicked out.
Ok I love you more. To infumty and beyong.
Dude, we have the same penis size. Best friends for life.
She went to college and exploded out of the slut closet.
My dad is complaining about how his computer keeps getting viruses. I don't have the heart to tell him he needs to stop downloading so much porn.
she's like bobby knight all she does is scream and point
this one can actually spell my name, that's a shoe-in
My penis hasn't been this frustrated since I was like 13 and I awkwardly got boners at school dances
All I remember is saying that "fire will make it all better"
I held a cracker & gaterade down for an hour. I feel like this will be my greatest accomplishment of the day.
that bitch in the red sedan is still teasing me with the ice cream cone. i'm going to show her my dick
Is this one of those "if you didnt give such good head we couldn't be friends" moments?
Thanks for getting me stoned. My manager started quizzing me about the menu and I struggled until he asked me to describe the tortilla soup. I said "tasty"
I'm drunk filing my taxes in a bar on a Monday afternoon in a Regular Show onesie. I think I'm starting to get the hang of this whole adult thing.
I have successfully trained your dog to bring me pudding cups!
Randomize
