when you find your car can you pick me up? his mom is here and im hungover
Vegas for my brothers bachelor party. Just landed and I have a boner. I'm giggly and teary eyed I'm so excited.
I don't care if he is my ex... I have the deed to his dick until someone else fucks him. We broke up 2 years ago.... I am still holding that deed!
We're lucky we aren't prostitutes by now. Whats the etiquette for returning a pair of heels with blood on them?
I just celebrated my ex boyfriends birthday by having more sex than he will today.
we're using his nephews tonka truck toy as a cooler for the beer
We didn't have sex but he is somehow naked and laying on top of me. his dick is touching my leg and freaking me the fuck out.
Trust me. I don't get home before 5am. I know what Immmm doing. BTW bail money is in my closet. PEACE
Really because I got kicked out the eagles game for running up n down the steps singing ' fly eagles fly ' then punched a Dallas fan in the face before the game even started..
I have decided that today will be all about indulgence and hedonism.
I'm home alone drinking wine, so high, scrubbing my house down... This is what my thirsty thursday has become
My dick pics could make it to the popular page on Instagram.
She's like the sister I never had that I want to bang.
I was too lazy to get my chapstick out of my purse so i lubed up my lips with pizza grease. On a scale of 1-10 how embarassed should i be?
You literally brought me back to life and then fucked it out of me
Randomize
