I'm gonna keep this simple. I threw up in your pillow case. Sorry.
No see this is how It goes: guys will fuck virgin girls. But girls don't really want to fuck virgin guys. So you're good have no fear.
this mix will be the most desperate cry for affection in the history of itunes.
I just saw a sign that said "STRIPPERS!!! As seen on Jerry Springer!". As if Springer is the highest honor. I'm pretty sure we're in south Georgia.
You ad-libbed two DETAILED rounds of price is right, 1 wheel of fortune, and 1 deal or no deal.... by yourself with sound effects and music included
You really could become the cat lady we've always dreamed of.
Also, I found your gauge.
I found it under my pillow like a gift from the Sex Fairy.
Somehow I ended up in a different costume dancing with some tree of a guy in the basement bathroom, what did you give me?
I vaguely remember a drunken mid sex pinky promise to not let it get weird.
I'm wine drunk & this is not good news for anybody
At the bar in my pajamas again
Ummm that is the 3rd time this week and it is Wednesday
What do you mean not that crazy? I had sex last night. with my\nBOSS. in the restaurant where we WORK.... ON A DINNER TABLE.
look, im sorry that i yelled at your little brother, threw my car keys at him and smashed a stale cookie with a pool cue, but i swear to god i didn't poop on the floor. it was one of your dogs.
he's the kind of guy you give a fake number to and he still finds out your real number anyway...
I left my Bacardi and dignity in your freezer. Will come get it later.
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