you just love her because she lets you bang her with fruits and veggies!
Going back to college after four years is reminding me why i love cheating... they dont let me cheat on tests but they sure try hard to make me cheat on my girl
fyi, take the long route to the library. the "can i be your baby daddy?" homeless man migrated back for winter
did you fuck him yet?
hahaha who do you think your talking to.. a nun?
Khloé Kardashian Finally Speaks Out About The Tristan Thompson Cheating Scandal
This is going to be a 3 day beach sex fest. Do you understand
Just now remembered singing Trashy Women at the reception. Not karaoke, just sang along with the mic I stole from the DJ. All while still in my dress drinking champagne from the bottle
Stories of my weekends have cause divorces, are you sure you wanna hang out?
My day may involve a drug pinata. I LOVE MY LIFE.
We're looking for the removeable roof from her Miata. Winner gets a 40.
15 Porn Memes You’re Only Allowed To Laugh At If You’re Over 18
I AM COVERED IN FAKE BLOOD AND REAL CUM. I AM AWESOME
Dude you of all people would miss her giving him a handjob in front of the whole party
He said it wasn't ladylike of me to drink more whiskey than him. I told him to stop being a little bitch.
Willing booties have sort of a tractor beam for me.
I'm high on the exercise bike at the gym. I feel like Lance Armstrong
ALL I WANT IS SEMEN IN/ON/AROUND MY BODY. WHY IS HE MAKING THIS SO HARD.